no weigh in today (she cancelled, so i will have to wait another week to see if there is any difference)

which there should be since i havent been able to eat much, am really quite ill, mu stomach has been 'upset' for almost a week now, am off to the doctor to see what wrong.... because i was in the worse pain this morning (lay down with hot water bottle for an hour and it eased) but the pain is still there in the background.

am struggling to get food in/keep food down, which i know is nt good... i have cease the cycling seeing as i am unable to eat much i think it would be counteractive

A friend died on wed (last week) although i only heard today (the grapevien from South africa is slow) so in my head he died today, now i know we werent that close (my fault, mot things in my life from friendships with men, to relationships, etc are my fault because im neurotic) but he was still someone who was present in my life for a good 6years.

This is dedicated to all the people i have lost, know that you were loved

Natalie Van Der Ouver (aged 8)
Illona Sommerset (aged 40)
Danny Karipedies (aged 10)
Charlie Siabelo (aged 19)
Martin Olds (aged 48)
Gloria Olds (aged 68)
Ben Richards (aged 20)